Anna is 18 Months Old and I'm Still Recovering from the "Robin Scherbatsky" Cocktail. (Unrelated)

woooooo!!! it's summer time! finally! the busy-ness of this summer has been a bit overwhelming, but it's lifting. it's lifting! so i'm stealing a few mins (that means 'minutes.' you see? so busy can't even finish senten) to finally blog a bit.

the one-act play i was in is done. it went fine. it's done. did i already say that? it was good to be on stage again, but hobbies are for other people for now, i think. what else? our side businesses are growing slowly and that's exciting and a bit nerve-wracking. i continue to LOVE my job. just threw a mean bachelorette party for my sister. it was a 'how i met your mother' themed party and it was legen- wait for it-

anna is now 18 months old. she is hilarious and rambunctious and huge. 

the pediatrician at her well-visit said she's 'advanced.' of course, she was referring to the fact that she already throws a pretty decent temper tantrum, and at such a tender young age, too. neat. :)

she's chatty and stubborn and goofy and brave and we just like her more and more every day.

henry has recently sort of left the stubborn, mad phase and is now pretty reasonable and cooperative. whenever he says "SURE. I CAN DO THAT" instead of arguing with me, i have to kind of take a beat and realize what's happening and change tactics..."well, ok, then. super. let's, uh...do that then....(wuuuut!)" 

we actually took him out on a henry/daddy/mommy date the other night because he's been such a  decent and upstanding citizen lately. we went to sushi, the MAGICAL CANDY SHOP and mini golf. it was a great night all around. he was really sweet and kept wanting to include anna in it when we were making plans, but in the end i think he dug the one-on-two time. his attention was preserved for the first half of the put-put course, which was pretty good (and about the same as mine. 18 holes!? what the what??).

next week they're both to be in a wedding. it's my sister's wedding and it's kind of a big deal. i have to look fancy and robb has to somehow keep the kids wrangled while i'm looking fancy so that they ALSO look fancy and not like blubbering hysterical messes in dress clothes (or out of dress clothes. dress clothes piled around them on the floor.....naked giggling tiny streakers running through the church is one of my well-founded fears). we'll see. my sister is a chill bride and keeps promising she doesn't care what happens with the kids as long as they're there and involved. so....we'll....see.

what else? oh yeah.....maybe my most exciting news that you CANNOT tell my children. you have to promise. pinky swear. i mean it.....our families have agreed against all sound judgement to watch the kids for a loooooong weekend this fall. it's our anniversary and robb and i are going to orlando (in florida!) for a medical conference for me and some kid-less time at the parks!!!!!  i cannot even calculate how awesome this is going to be, but also i feel tremendous guilt. the dates are marked in my calendar as "bad parent vacation."

i'll work on getting over it.

-dary. legendary.

The Working Title of this Post is "Fuck Summer" But I'll Probably Change It

first, let me catch up on what's been happening 'round these parts. it's been ages since i've blogged. i have a half dozen posts started in my head and notes app on my phone, but actually sitting down for any length of time alone at a computer with a keyboard hasn't happened.

work is busy, as usual. kids are busy, as usual. in addition to weekly swimming lessons, we've been doing soccer lessons for henry, too. anna is...very attached to me. she's getting more interesting and fun and speaking real english words, but now has the words to express EXACTLY what she isn't getting or how i could RIGHT NOW better serve her. and she says "chewbacca" but still won't say "henry." i think it's very much on purpose and she's trying to establish control. like refusing to say 'voldemort,' maybe? if you say his name you give him power or something?

henry has started breaking out of the house because he can and all of jokes end in BUTT HAHAHAHAHA. his hair has gotten really long and he's been refusing to get it cut, but i'm making him because today he started doing the jusin bieber head flick to get it out of his eyes. NOPE.

we're still working on our side businesses and figuring out how to grow those. and we're all in/involved in my sister's wedding next month, so there are parties to plan and dresses to fit and legs to shave and children to coax into tuxes for that, too. and then i auditioned for and got into a one-act play, so i've been rehearsing for that in my "spare time."

i sheepishly admitted that i was doing this play on top of everything else and a good friend said "you're such an idiot." #truth. that's how you know the people who really love you. they will call you on your idiot ways and always reveal your #truths to you.  it's too late, though. next time i'm call her first before i make the bad choice (no i will not. we both know i will not).

ANYway, so that's all to say that all kind of kid blog-worthy things have happened that i haven't gotten out of my head and onto the "page."

warning: much whining to follow. and poop. always with the poop.

first. summer is an enormous let-down when you're responsible for little kids. i mean, srsly, it's one of those things that should be and HAS been so glorious and is SO ruined by small children. (blessings. they are. you know i know they are. love them. so grateful. ok. going to keep whining now).

i think of summer like it was in high school. these long days with not much to do. lying out meant actually risking being there long enough to get burned or sweaty. the beach was a thing we did. we ambled. we even got bored sometimes. we walked a lot just to be doing something. there were endless lazy gatherings of friends and new loves and fireflies and bonfires and just peace.

so NOW, summer is sunscreen in the eyeball but not on the back of the tiny neck where now it's all red. layers of bug spray. and fucking TICKS everywhere! in my yard, in my dreams, everywhere. (is that a target lesion!?) flowers and plants you put in the ground on purpose being pulled out by the roots by cackling mischief in purple shoes. and they ALWAYS want to be outside. which is so great! yay! kids still want to explore nature and not watch TV all the time. yes! call the journalists! except there's still crap i need to get done inside the house and i cannot leave them alone outside because they will obviously relieve themselves of life.

srsly. summer means new ways for the kids to kill themselves like in pools and drinking from rusty hoses and running loose into the street. and in those same bonfires that used to be sexy and fun.

all mammals get squirrely in nice weather, i think. kids are, of course, not exceptions- maybe actually models of squirrelyness. so i find myself saying more than usual "look at my face. do you see that it is talking and those words are directed at you? you have to at least acknowledge that i am speaking." and you, know, by the time i finish that needlessly long statement, she is in the garage checking out the weed poisons and he is streaking naked through the front yard wielding the gardening sheers .

so a few weeks ago i got out the filthy blow-up pool from last season that we had just sort of let rot over the winter. because i was simultaneously watching the kids/preventing their demises, it took me FOREVER to wash the thing and figure out how to blow it up. i mean, like 2 hours of yelling and mild successes and then more yelling and finally, big empty raft. (where is robb in all this, you ask? he's been putting out these glorious meals from the grill that take about 3 hours to prep and serve, so he's off the hook for much of the day as he "makes dinner." it's all a very elaborate ploy but it gets good grilled food in my belly, so i'm playing along).

so, anyway. pool finally inflated...and as soon as the 30 degree water from the hose is in it, both kids jumped in, fully clothed.

and she was in her regular diaper.

and so.

'is that a wood chip? why would there be a wood chip in the water? we don't have any----ooooooh noooo!'

so i emptied, re-washed and deflated the stupid poop pool.

fuck summer.

She Speaks.

anna started saying sentences recently. 

'I POOP' which is actually kind of amazing since it's accurate a large amount of the time to a diaper full of turd or at least heavy urine.

and this morning at 6am when she had dropped a spider ring she found while pillaging, 'WHERE IS IT? WHERE IS IT?'

and a variation on that, always looking for her brother, 'WHERE HE GO? WHERE HE GO?'

there's a person in that baby!! it's so exciting. firey little ginger baby can now scream words at us instead of just sounds. 

two videos i took tonight that demonstrate her speech and comprehension and mastery of menace.

1. 'I POOP'

http://youtu.be/RzJRLNd1q5I

2. (and number 2...) 'I POOPED BUT YOU CAN'T CATCH ME')

http://youtu.be/SyH9gMExAOw

ANNAmal is 17 months

anna continues to be a wonderful raging lunatic. she is absolutely afraid of nothing and she gives deep hugs. she likes to read books and backs herself into a cozy hole next to you when you offer to read one to her. she climbs everything and falls off of most of it. if someone dares to take something from her, she tea kettle screams and shakes and her head spins entirely around on her neck. she does not like to be screwed with at all. 

her language is really showing up lately and it's so fun. she had new words every day this week, it seemed. tonight she said "POPCORN." she won't say henry's name yet, but if you say "say Henry" she laughs and starts puckering her lips for a kiss and scrambles to run and find him wherever he is to plant one on him. he's very indulgant and seems to like her a lot. thank God. 

she sounds a lot like christopher walken when she talks. "you want to watch a show, anna?" "SHAH-OH." i'll get her to say champagne next. 

DO I HAVE TO GET POKES?

henry was a war hero today getting his four year old vaccines.

on the way there, we talked at length about how pokes are valuable because they give us a little germ that teaches our bodies how to build army cells to kill that germ if it ever shows up again, so the germ can't make us sick.

he did a great job processing it and came to terms w/ it and gave the nurse permission to administer them, even watched the needle. she was great, informative and also very straight with him. he sat on his own and got through it like a champ.

i'm so thankful. i want him to be the one who owns his body and has knowledge about it & grants or denies access to it. i'm so glad he's who he is- this stuff getting easier the older he gets. i have nightmares of holding kids down for shots in my peds rotation in PA school.

he told robb when he got home that he USE-D THE FORCE TO BE BRAVE.

that's some jedi peace of mind right there.

Henry's 4th It Was, It Was

henry is 4 years old now. 

the other day, i picked him up and put him on his little stool he uses to reach the sink when brushing his teeth and he said something like MOM, YOU HAVE TO STOP PICKING ME UP. I'M A BIG GUY NOW.

i am not typically sentimental about the children emerging from the babies that were, but this birthday has me a little moist around the eyeballs. 

he's such a real person now. with such a huge, sassy head. i'm crazy for him and this is the best he's ever been in all his years of best-ness-es. he's clever and funny and sweet, so achingly sweet. he's always learning and growing the brain and you can see him set up and realign his position on the world constantly as he inputs new data. it's so cool. he's imaginative and goofy and good. so good. 

he's also a little schmo sometimes, but that's his duty. 

anyway. he had a really great birthday party. actual friends from preschool came, which blew his little mind. i had my reservations at first about having stranger parents to my house and having to be social with them (since i feel so awkward in these kinds of exchanges) and i totes mailed it in with last-second invites scribbled on note paper and copied and shoved in their kids' preschool boxes....but they came and it wasn't weird at all and henry was in his bliss. (ok, it was a little weird. i was a little weird. at some point i completely introduced one set of parents to their own son because i'd forgotten who belonged to who, but.....well....)

the other reason i might be a bit moist around the eyeballs is my hormonal imbalance related to the menstruations. i won't contaminate henry's birthday post with talk of my vaginal goings-on, but prepare yourselves, because much talk of lady parts are on their way to an upcoming post. 

toodles!

The Following Childrens Books Will Not Make You Adults Want to Poke Your Eyes Out

if you're looking for gifts or for your own kids' use, these books are adult friendly and can be read 1,000 times and still make you laugh or smile. 

any to add?

(i missed Goodnight Moon, The Napping House, King Bidgood's in the Bathtub, some other Sandra Boynton books, Shel Silverstein poetry books which we all love ALL the time, some Seuss, and probably others. the moose one is H's current favorite. mine, too.)